Divorce can feel like the rug’s been ripped out from under you. Whether initiated by you or your significant other, it is one of the most emotionally draining and complex processes. If you are going through a divorce, you may feel overwhelmed, sometimes fail to process emotions, or feel like everything is strange.
But do you know what the good news is? Once it’s over, you’ll come back stronger than ever, more self-aware and ready for all life’s next challenges. In this blog post, we will guide you on how to get through a divorce without losing your inner self.
The Emotional Toll of Divorce: And Why It’s Normal
Divorce is not another relationship. It is a lifetime commitment, your routine, your emotional value, your sentiments, and even your future plans will be altered because of it. It’s okay to cry and grieve about the situation, as the world is falling apart. Because for a while it is, these are the genuine emotions people experience when they divorce. But don’t worry, over time, everything will start feeling better.
From Shock to Acceptance: Understanding the Stages
These are the emotional processes when a person shows grief, and they usually include:
| Anger | On your partner, in the situation |
| Bargaining | Convincing the person to try and stay |
| Psychological Disturbance | Deep sadness, loss of interest, low energy |
| Shock and Denial | This can’t be happening |
| Acceptance | Understanding, no approval |
Everyone processes this situation, but of course, the journey for every individual is different, and they do not happen in any specific order. You might bounce between all these stages, and that’s completely normal.
Coping With Divorce in Healthy, Grounded Ways
Understanding how to cope with divorce healthily is the key to self-awareness and betterment. Remember, not everything can be fixed overnight, and just taking baby steps can make progress. Let’s discuss some grounded practices:
Talk to Someone You Trust
A friend, therapist, or coach can help you process emotions without thinking of you or judging you.
Create a New Routine
Getting familiar with things can enhance comfort. Even the simplest habits, like evening journaling or the morning workout and exercise, can help you improve your routine.
Move your Body
Physical activity such as yoga, dancing, and running in your backyard helps you release emotional tensions.
Eat and Sleep Regularly
Fixing your sleep cycle may sound very basic to everyone, but when your life is spinning, stability starts with basic, small changes.
Avoid Rushing into Major Decisions
Let yourself feel before you leap. Healing doesn’t happen in one moment. It’s a journey of small, quiet victories.
What to Avoid: Unhealthy Ways to Cope With Divorce
When you are badly hurt, it’s tempting to distract yourself with the things that make you pretend you are fine. But instead of healing you, these responses slow down your healing process.
Let’s explore some unhealthy ways to cope with divorce, not for the judgment perspective, but to bring awareness.
Here are a few common signs you need to watch out for:
- Moving on with one person before processing the last relationship.
- Isolating yourself from friends, family, and relatives.
- Becoming a workaholic to avoid being alone with your thoughts
- Excess substance intake and drinking to escape from feelings.
Such a coping mechanism might offer short-term relief, but it can cause problems in the long run. The key to recognizing such behavior is to question yourself: Am I healing or hiding from the situation?
Divorce Looks Different for Everyone
Divorce is a journey that is different for everyone. Individuals’ emotions, reactions, and coping mechanisms may look different from one person to another, and that’s completely okay.
Men, Women, and the Unique Emotional Journey
The emotions of a man going through a divorce remain silent. Socially, men are suppressed from showing weak emotions, which makes it difficult for them to process emotions like regret, loneliness, and grief.
On the other hand, divorce for a woman primarily includes the loss of identity and emotional grief, specifically when her role was tied to partnership, motherhood, and marriage. She might go through anxiety, loneliness about the future, and fear of significant financial instability as well.
Irrespective of the gender, the key role a worrier should play is to seek professional help, and speak to feel heard and seen.
Helping Children Feel Safe and Supported During Divorce
If you are divorced and blessed with kids, your emotional landscape will fluctuate even more. This is why you manage your emotions and guide them on their path.
Simple tips that help you support your children:
- Kids often ask questions, and you should answer them age-appropriately and honestly.
- Encourage your kids to open communication.
- Maintain their routine and build some sense of security for them.
- Give them constant reassurance and remind them that divorce isn’t anyone’s fault.
Moving Forward With Confidence: Even If You’re Not Ready Yet
Here is a moment of truth for you. There is a high chance you might disagree, but even after divorce, you are still complete and whole. It might look like the plan doesn’t work, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be a beautiful journey filled with healing and betterment.
To get through the divorce, it is essential to have all your answers. All you have to do is keep showing up for yourself. Everything will return to you one day. The confidence will return. The peace will return. The joy will return. One bad chapter doesn’t mean the end of life, but this means you’ll have even better chapters of life.
Support Is Closer Than You Think – Talk to Shine Mental Health
Divorce is a journey that often needs to be navigated all alone. At Shine Mental Health, we provide every individual with the tailored support, therapy, and treatment that meet their needs.
Whether you’re experiencing a heartbreak or building a journey with healing and resilience, we are experts in guiding individuals through life transitions. Contact us via email or fill out a form.
FAQs
What are the emotional stages of divorce?
The emotional changes of divorce are anger, bargaining, sadness, and acceptance. Everyone has their own journey; therefore, this process is non-linear.
How can I cope with divorce stress?
Suppose you are someone who wants to cope with the stress of divorce. You must incorporate tools like physical activity, journaling, and social support. Don’t be afraid to seek help.
What is the hardest part of a divorce?
The hardest part of the divorce is the loss of identity, daily activity, and imagining the future you had.
What are unhealthy coping mechanisms after divorce?
According to the research, incorporating substance abuse, extreme workaholism, irregular sleep patterns, and isolation from loved ones is an unhealthy way to cope with the divorce.
Is therapy helpful for divorce recovery?
Yes, therapy is one of the most helpful ways to recover from a nonjudgmental space, process emotions, navigate this life change with support, and rebuild self-worth.
